How to grow tomatoes

The recent uncalled for appearance in this blog of cats and nudity has prompted a rash of correspondence, almost all of which is related to the latter subject. So much so that I am afraid that I must declare this topic closed. I was going to make an exception for the detailed, albeit unlikely, advice which I received as to how best to achieve a growth spurt from one's tomato plants. However, this blog's motto is seeing is believing and in the absence of photographs - of the tomato plants obviously - I cannot in good conscience post anything. Let's just say that I would be surprised if any of my readers had in their possession the necessary item of clothing.

I saw the rather excellent Adrian Byron Burns last night. He has played with regular blog-featured artists such as Bill Wyman and Albert Lee and been opening act for Neil Young among others. How he then finds himself performing in the Junction Inn, Otley in front of fifty people, only half a dozen of whom are paying any attention, was a mystery I pondered as I watched him repeatedly return to the bar for another whisky. A first rate guitarist with a deep, deep voice, his repertoire ranged from Little Feat and Smokey Robinson covers to songs associated with (though not originally by) Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix and Big Bill Broonzy. Very good, though a little sad. As an aside, of those in the pub who had gone specifically for the music I was the only one who didn't look like Gandalf; my loss I think.